Initiating Personalized Leadership Development Conversations with Your Boss and Hiring a Coach

Throughout my career, I have always placed great importance on leadership development.

It was a priority not only for my personal growth but also for the betterment of those working alongside me.

I devoted countless hours to reading books, attending leadership seminars, and seeking inspiration from various resources.

However, I must admit that I sometimes fell into the trap of absorbing valuable insights without effectively implementing them or allowing them to influence my team.

Deep down, I yearned for a more tailored approach to leadership development, one that resonated with my unique style and aspirations.

But the challenge lay in finding the right avenue to fulfill this desire.

It seemed elusive, like an uncharted path waiting to be discovered.

Embarking on personalized leadership development requires initiating conversations with your boss and considering hiring a coach.

This blog offers tips on how to approach your boss and make a compelling case for resources tailored to your growth.

Reflect on Goals and Needs:

Take time to reflect on your leadership goals and challenges before speaking with your boss.

Research Relevant Resources:

Explore coaches and programs that align with your goals and leadership style.

Schedule a Meeting:

Request a meeting with your boss to discuss your development aspirations.

Communicate Passion:

Express your passion for personal growth and share past improvement examples.

Present Benefits:

Highlight the benefits of personalized development, linking it to team success.

Showcase Your Plan:

Present a well-thought-out plan addressing your needs and desired outcomes.

Be Open to Feedback:

Listen to your boss's concerns, address questions, and reassure them of your commitment.

Explore Available Resources:

Inquire about existing coaching programs or professional development budgets.

Consider Hiring a Coach Independently:

If necessary, invest in an external coach aligned with your goals.

By initiating conversations with your boss and considering a coach, you can take meaningful steps toward personalized leadership development. Reflect, research, communicate, and present your plan to create opportunities for growth and success.

Christin

Embracing Vulnerability: How My Professional Coach Gave Me Permission to Be Authentically Messy

When I decided to take the plunge and enlist a professional coach, it felt like jumping into an unknown abyss. I was stuck in limbo and desperate for change but had no idea how to begin my journey down this unfamiliar path.

With their help though, I'm now well on my way!

My first session was March 9th of 2022. My coach, Ryan, laid out some ground rules for us but the most important one he said was to “show up as myself no matter what.” 

This permission was something I had never heard before from someone I considered an authority nor ever given myself.

As a leader, I was taught, you are always on stage, always have to be positive, leave your shit at the door, lead by example. Sure, I was told to be myself but never to show up as I was.

This created a really safe space for me and is something I cherish and pass along to my clients. 

He also told me he would speak hard truths a.k.a call me on my shit. He still does this to this day when he hears me start to beat myself up. I can be vicious to myself sometimes mentally but I am working on that :)

He also told me I didn’t need to come prepared everytime we met. This was refreshing as I have put so much time and energy in my life being prepared for everything. It’s exhausting.

I remember getting off that first zoom call full of hope for the first time in awhile. I had found someone who wanted to help me do some serious investing in myself. Yes, I had a very supportive husband and incredible boss, but this was different. 

I had found a partner. 

I didn’t feel alone anymore.

My first challenge to you: Find a partner.

Find someone who supports you, calls you out on your shit, holds you accountable and allows you to show up just as you are.

Christin

Why Your Strengths Aren't Serving You Anymore

Back in the past, during a pivotal moment in my career, I was fortunate enough to be acquainted with a book called StrengthsFinder.

It happened at a time when my self-assurance was waning, and the mere title of this book filled me with anticipation.

Driven by my excitement, I hurriedly made my way to Barnes and Noble and wasted no time in acquiring it.

I had set my sights on reading it while basking on a sunny beach in Mexico during our upcoming vacation.

The book, StrengthsFinder, left an indelible mark on me.

Discovering that my top strength was Achiever filled me with inspiration and joy.

Known for my enthusiasm, whenever I stumble upon something exciting, I can't help but share it with everyone I know, as if I were the sole inventor.

Embracing my true nature, I eagerly approached each manager, urging them to read the book.

Most people I spoke to about StrengthsFinder shared my enthusiasm.

However, when I mentioned it to my boss at the time, their response caught me off guard.

"You are reading a fucking self-help book?" they exclaimed dismissively.

At that moment, I realized that my values didn't align with the company I was working for. It served as a stark reminder that it was time for me to seek new opportunities elsewhere.

Embracing the role of an achiever brought me immense satisfaction.

Crafting lists to tackle daily tasks, both in my professional and personal life, filled me with joy and a sense of accomplishment.

With each item I crossed off those lists, I felt a surge of momentum propelling me forward.

For a decade, I held onto the belief that this strength defined a significant part of my identity and fueled my career progression.

Undoubtedly, it did contribute to my success.

However, my journey into coaching training unveiled a deeper truth – as an achiever, or more accurately, a hyper achiever, this very trait has also been a hindrance in various aspects of my life.

What's a Hyper-Achiever?

According to Positive Intelligence, a Hyper-Achiever is a Saboteur that is dependent on constant performance and achievement for self-respect and validation.

Someone who is highly focused on external success, leading to unsustainable workaholic tendencies and loss of touch with deeper emotional and relationship needs.

How has this made me successful?

1. It’s made me competitive

2. It’s kept me positive in front of my team when times are tough

3. It’s helped me be goal-oriented

How has this held me back?

1. It’s made my self-acceptance conditional based on achievement

2. It has stopped me from taking time to celebrate my accomplishments 

3. I’ve lost touch with my deeper feelings and ability to connect deeply with others

Becoming aware of my saboteur was a turning point in my life.

I learned to recognize its presence in my thoughts and understand how it influenced me.

This newfound self-awareness allowed me to make conscious choices and challenge the validity of those thoughts.

As a result, I discovered the importance of slowing down, deepening my relationships, and enjoying the process of each task.

By embracing curiosity and continuous improvement, I have experienced a profound transformation in my life.

How can you manage your Saboteurs?

1. Take this assessment to find out your top 3 Saboteurs.

2. Read the descriptions and let them sit with you for a few days.

3. Know that these are (only) thoughts and not facts. 

4. Understand that these thoughts were formed early in your childhood and that you no longer need them in your adult life. 

5. Start recognizing these thoughts when they occur and determine how you want to act on them.

6. Take 6 deep breaths when the thoughts arise to take you out of that moment and give you clarity on your next decision.

Discovering and managing our saboteurs is paramount to living a fulfilled life.

Click here to start learning how to manage your saboteurs.

Through self-awareness and introspection, we can challenge and reframe limiting thoughts, fostering personal growth and resilience.

By making conscious choices and cultivating positive mindsets, we unlock the joy of the journey, deepen relationships, and embrace continuous improvement.

It is through this transformative process that we create a life filled with authenticity, fulfillment, and boundless potential.

Share this blog with one person you know who would like to develop their strengths.

Take the tiny first step in developing your strengths now.

Christin

We Don't Need More Restaurants, We Need Better Ones

I went out to lunch this week at a charming local restaurant downtown and started chatting with our server about her experience working for this restaurant. 

We asked her questions like:

What does development look like in her position?

When is the last time she’s had a one on one?

When was the last time someone told her she was doing a great job?

What’s the biggest challenge her restaurant faces?

This server told us that she wished her management team knew how to control their emotions and not take their stress or frustration out on the staff.

She said the restaurant was constantly turning over staff because management was quick to fire.

She wished there was better communication amongst managers and hourly employees about things they could all work on as a team.

She said it had been 2 years since she’d had a one-on-one and that the new manager had never sat her down to get to know her or give her feedback.

That she’d love to know how to put more money in her pocket if someone could provide her some tips on how todo so.

This feedback came to us in the span of 60 seconds. You could tell this server was excited to share her opinion and lit up at the thought of someone investing in her.

Despite her feedback, this server has worked at this restaurant for 2 years and her service was attentive, kind, professional and she even offered us to-go cups on our way out. 

I got teary-eyed hearing this server share this feedback with us and then I got fired up.

I know, deep down, that restaurant owners want to be the best they can be and that employees want to do the best they can for their managers, owners, teammates and guests.

Restaurants need our help and support.

It’s time we start working together. 

I am going to keep having these conversations with employees from each restaurant I visit and keep offering resources to every restaurant owner who wants to be the best they can be.

I am also creating an employee engagement survey that I will offer to any restaurant for free who is interested in taking better care of their staff and improving their overall business. If you know anyone interested, please let me know.

Christin